Choosing a name for your baby is like choosing contestants for a TV reality show.
Hormonal Dad wanted to break the news of his pregnancy to his old buddy, but it was not to be. Life can be really tough on some people.
Hormonal Dad has fancied all his life the moment his babe will break the good news of becoming pregnant. They would hug and look into the sunset. But life chooses its own course.
All we wanted was a pregnancy break, but we soon find ourselves exposed to terror attacks. It may be good to die for your pregnant wife and your fetus, as this is the only thing that matters when faced with danger.
Who needs 3D fetus scans, anyway? If my kid comes out looking like the Great Gonzo, I would still love him and protect him.
I haven't done much for nine months, but when my babe and I enter Alice's studio, it became clear that I too want to be photographed in pregnancy. I needed evidence that my babe was not a single mom. Is this too much to ask?
There are things better not said. Even if you think pregnancy is not a disease, you do not say it to a woman in advanced pregnancy. It'd be like me being honest answering "massively," when she asks if she has gained any weight recently.
A tour of the maternity ward can be a huge moment for a couple expecting a baby, but my babe is stuck in traffic and I'm getting lost with a tough nurse. I have to bully her to make sure my baby is born with a daddy in charge.
For nine months I've been talking away my babe's fears. Now, outside the operating theater as my wife is being scrubbed, I become a puddle of fear, anxiety and hysterics.
I don't know how to play soccer or what is the difference between an offside and a penalty, but I'm sure that I want a son for the most primitive reason there is. No apology.